Marriage is one of the most sacred gifts from God to his children. It's his design to ensure that life will move forward. Marriage isn't a way humans spend their lives while waiting for heaven. But an institution Jesus Himself gave to us for our good and the good of all humanity.
Marriage is a beautiful mystery that's one of the fiercest targets of the enemy. Today, the soul of the family is front and center in spiritual warfare. Luckily, Jesus gave us the model of a perfect family, the Holy Family He joined when He became flesh. Two months ago, we celebrated Christmas. But sometimes, we overlook the central focus of the celebration, which is the family unit at the heart of the manger scene.
As of this writing, I'm preparing to marry later in the year. And the role of marriage, the spiritual journey, is paramount in my and my future bride's mind. As I look toward one of the most significant changes in my life, I think of how music will play a role in our love story now and in the future. My fiancé and I are currently looking for our wedding song. We're also looking at what songs we'll play at our wedding.
But before our forthcoming marriage ceremony, we're getting ready for Valentine's Day. The secular commercialization of the day has caused some to dismiss it. Still, the day of love comes from a third-century Roman saint, a bishop who secretly married Christians during a time of persecution.
Saint Valentine gave his life, as so many Christians did in those days, to keep the will of Christ alive. Marriage was that important. Valentine's Day's commercial image centers on pastel hearts and chocolate candies. Likewise, love songs become themes for many couples holding hands while having a romantic dinner for two. But let's reflect on the true meaning of the holiday.
Romantic relationships often drive mainstream music, and this is reflected in some of today's and yesterday's most notable hits. While Christian music often focuses on expressing love for God, many songs about romantic love are sung from a Christian perspective.
As Valentine's Day approaches, let's explore some classic Christian songs that depict the romantic journey of our relationship with Jesus Christ. I'll highlight songs from different stages of this relationship, showcasing how the longing of our hearts when we're single culminates in a fulfilling marriage where Christ is the foundation.
Nouveaux - "Maybe Tomorrow"
Many adults want to meet that special someone. Maybe you've never had a boyfriend or girlfriend or recently broke up. But God is calling you to marry. Sometimes, waiting on God to reveal that special someone is difficult. I didn't meet my fiancé until my late 20s. So, I can relate to the hard wait.
Classic Christian band Nouveaux's song "Maybe Tomorrow" takes an almost dreamlike approach. In the song, the vocalist sings to his future spouse—even though he hasn't met her yet. When the chorus kicks in, you can't help but feel inspired to keep hoping in the dreams God has placed in the heart: "I'll kiss the air that covers you/I'll watch the moonlight dance in your eyes/I'll hold you safely in my arms/maybe tomorrow, you'll be mine."
Petra - "Love"
This love ballad from the iconic Christian rock band Petra is inspired by 1 Corinthians 13's description of love as patient, kind, and selfless. The age-old verse used at weddings is widely quoted, yet it's much deeper than its mainstream application. Sometimes, separating infatuation from real love can be challenging when we meet someone. "Love" serves as a reminder of true love rooted in Jesus Christ. Love is patient, and it doesn't rejoice in the wrong. It's pure and "grows in the light of the Son."
The song itself isn't exclusively about romantic love. It's a suitable tune for marking the beginning of a more profound connection in a relationship.
Newsong - "When God Made You"
You can see God working in your life when you finally meet someone you love. This love song shows that the singer's love is the missing piece in their life and that "when God made you, he must have been thinking about me."
But the song doesn't reduce someone to being the missing piece in the singer's life. On the contrary, it speaks to the unique nature of marriage, that a husband and wife complete each other. It expresses that the couple must work together to build a marriage that reflects Christ. This song holds special significance for many Christian couples as they prepare to embark on the journey of marriage together.
Matthew Ward - "A Perfect Union"
Many of today's Christian music fans aren't familiar with contemporary singer Matthew Ward. But as a member of the pioneer Christian music group, 2nd Chapter of Acts, his voice is well known to many older Christian music enthusiasts. Mathew's song, "A Perfect Union," is an excellent fit for weddings. It sings of the beauty of Christian marriage: "A perfect union formed within His hand/Hands that formed the earth, the sky and sea/Still joins hearts together/Joining them in three-part harmony." The idea that God, the hands that formed the universe, brings two people together in a union to start a family is sobering.
Steven Curtis Chapman - "I Will Be Here"
Christian music veteran Steven Curtis Chapman wrote "I Will Be Here" for his wife. In this writer's opinion, the song is one of the most beautiful and renowned love songs in Christian music history. My fiancé and I are strongly considering including it in our wedding ceremony after a friend included it in hers.
The song has a simple yet profound message for newlyweds and long-time husbands and wives. The message says to support your spouse no matter what happens in life. Good times. Bad times. Steven couldn't know some of his and his wife's struggles when writing the song. And yet, the song stands as a testament to the beauty of a love that lasts a lifetime. "And just as sure as seasons are made for change/Our lifetimes are made for years." There aren't many statements about marriage more profound.
Andy Denton - "50 Years From Now"
Relationships have trials—even Christian marriages. Divorce is a real epidemic in our culture. Unfortunately, studies, such as those from the National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG), report roughly 40 to 50 percent of marriages end in divorce in the United States.
Of course, cases such as abuse warrant a split. But others disregard what Jesus says, "what God has joined together, let no man put asunder." Several verses of the Bible say that marriage is a life-long commitment. It's easier said than done. Divorce is painful. And in no way do I want to minimize those who have gone through that pain. But the Christian community must address the widespread divorce culture to build God's kingdom.
Christian artist Andy Denton's song, "50 Years From Now," speaks to the issues that motivate divorce: "What do you do when the fire's gone/And passion fades to gray/Just being together used to be enough/But now what." The song calls on the couple to consider what might be lost if they don't find a way to make things work. This goal may be too simplistic, but it's a place to start. Christ has ordained the family to be the building blocks of His kingdom. And our trail of broken families can be a driving cause of our culture's ever-growing troubles.
Out of the Grey - "So We Never Got to Paris"
Husband-and-wife duo Scott and Christine Dente, known as Out of the Grey, have a song titled "So We Never Got to Paris" that is a suitable choice to close the playlist. It sings from the perspective of a couple enjoying a loving and fruitful marriage. The couple included the song on their 1995 album, Gravity. I've seen the song accused of romanticizing the notion of giving up on one's dreams. I'm afraid I must disagree with those opinions.
The song's message is like a line I hear in films: "Not giving up a dream, but rather going after another one." Or like this exchange from the movie Marley and Me. Protagonist John says, "None of this was part of the plan." His wife replies, "No. But it's so much better." That theme has resonated with me through the years.
"So We Never Got to Paris" also reflects on the couple's unfulfilled dreams and aspirations they had as young lovers and the possibility that they may never come to fruition: "So we never got to Paris/And found the café of our dreams/But our table holds a whole world of memories/No, we never went to Venice/And strolled the streets alone/But we built our worlds together, and we got the best of both."
I take this chorus to heart as I look toward the future of my own marriage. I want to have a relationship based on the chorus’s logic. There's nothing wrong with wanting to visit Paris or Venice. I might even make the trip someday myself. But it's not a failure if you don't get the dream or any other, for that matter.
This song shows how the couple gets the best of their worlds—despite never visiting Paris. A Christ-centered marriage, for all its aspirations, needs to be content in Christ and what He has provided. Working toward bettering ourselves is important, but so is appreciating the beauty of what we have.
Regardless of where you are in your journey, always know that Christ has our best interests in mind, and if we're willing to walk with Him, we can trust that He will ultimately lead us to Himself. For many of us, marriage is a way that can eventually lead to Christ. That could be something even many Christians today can use as a reminder. And it's a great message to remember this Valentine's Day.
J.J. Francesco is a longtime contributor to the NRT Staff. He's published the novel 'Because of Austin' and regularly seeks new ways to engage faith, life, and community. His new novel, 'When Miracles Can Dream,' is out NOW!
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