Ha, ha, world
everyday I used to write you a letter
but you never wrote back
and you never made me feel any better
always sitting here
fretting and getting confused
halfway desperate
for a headline of hope in the news
when the telephone rang
I spilled it all over my sweater
the call was for me
and I answered the phone in the kitchen
but the room was too hot
I forgot I was cooking my chicken
I was burning like hell
but the stove wasn't on
then the voice on the line
says the chicken is gone
the receiver goes dead and it
hums while the plot starts to thicken
would I have hung up the phone had I known
the whole room would start swaying
I was instantly cold
and I knew why my life wasn't paying
I had money and fame
but my wealth wasn't wise
what good are the coins on a dead man's eyes
and the ringing of chimes in my head
said it's time to start praying
I been sitting here praying
and laying up treasures in heaven
I was home and the front door was locked
when the clock struck eleven
I heard the bride outside yell millennium
though the sun was still up
the twelfth hour has come
